hope

Reflections, Course-Corrections and Deep Gratitude…

/ pastorlynnmalone / Leave a comment

It is early Sunday morning. I love the early morning hours. They are the best time for me to pray, reflect, read and give thanks. Sometimes I write. Sometimes I don’t. Trust me. Coffee is better at 4:00 a.m., than at 8:00 a.m.

This morning is different than most mornings. It is different, first, because I’m breathing different air than usual. Vanessa and I were able to slip away to Hot Springs, AR for a little R & R over the holiday weekend.

I’m drinking coffee in a rented house. I tell you, this Vrbo thing is nice. You can actually rent someone’s home when you’re on vacation! As nice as it is, I’m not sure I could rent my home to perfect strangers. Seriously, someone you don’t know poking around in your personal space? A bit frightening to me, but here I am doing it in someone else’s home. Go figure?

As I reflect this Sunday morning, I am reflecting again on how fleeting life is. Even these moments of reflection seem to be fleeting, too.

It is different, secondly, because I am holding a tension between sorrow and joy this morning. Not that there isn’t always some sorrow and some joy resident in our lives, but this morning the contrast is particularly striking.

The Paradox of Life and Death

The news is filled with reports from the hill country of Texas and the flash flooding from the Guadalupe River. The sudden loss of life. The tragedy of families searching for loved ones. The tales of heroism. The heart-break to hear of little girls missing in the midst of it all. My heart is broken for those little girls and their families, and also for the Camp Mystic staff who was responsible for their safety. These past two mornings have beef filled with prayer for all of them. Those prayers continue this morning.

In the midst of the deep sorrow, I am also experiencing deep joy at having a few hours to connect (re-connect) with our daughters. Kelsey and her husband, Matt, spent a couple of nights with us here in Hot Springs, and Brittney and our grandson, Lincoln spent yesterday and last night with us. They are our little girls, and I am grateful (eternally so) that we’ve not experienced the horror of losing one of them. While my heart sinks at what I sense those families in Texas are experiencing, I give thanks to the good Lord for our children and the blessings He has poured out on our family.

The devil wants to make me feel guilty for being so grateful, but I refuse to succumb to his tactics. We hold life and death in tension constantly, and this morning is no different. As the Book of Common Prayer (and the Methodist funeral liturgy) reminds us:

In the midst of life, we are in death; From whom can we seek our help?

The answer, of course, is that we find our help in the name of the Lord. As challenging as it sometimes is to do, I hold the tension between life and death by grace and with gratitude, trusting that the Lord will give us strength to face whatever life brings our way.

Missing Annual Conference

I’m also reflecting this morning on Annual Conference. Yeah, I know right? But I must be missing Annual Conference. I’ve had two dreams this week that I was Annual Conference. It’s probably because my Facebook newsfeed has been filled with former colleagues who were attending Annual Conference, and who have been sharing their “new appointments” on their Facebook pages. That reality has brought both good and bad memories. Again, with the paradox (irony?) that is life.

I must say that I haven’t missed Annual Conference very much since I surrendered my credentials in the United Methodist Church. I’ll admit that first June in 2020 was different, but it would have been different anyway because of a little thing called Covid. Beginning in 2021, though, I connected with the Evangelical Methodist Church, and have attended their iteration of Annual Conference since then…until this year.

Due to circumstances beyond my control (that whole life and death thing again), I was unable to attend this year’s “Journey” session. I missed Annual Conference, literally. I suppose, through my subconscious, I’m missing it figuratively, too.

What do I miss? I miss the collegiality. I miss the friendships. I miss the fellowship. I miss the laughter over meals shared. I miss the worship. I miss the singing. I miss the work of Annual Conference. I miss the slipping away to the book store (or to the mall, or the coffee shop, or the golf course, or wherever) when there was a boring report session. Yes, there is much I miss about Annual Conference. The quiet mornings of this weekend have been moments of reflection on that loss.

The quiet mornings of this weekend have also brought me joy as I’ve reflected on the goodness of God since I left the United Methodist Church in 2019. It was a pain-staking decision to surrender my credentials that year, but let’s just say there are many actions the denomination has taken since that time that have affirmed our decision.

There were other options open to me in 2019, one of which was the path of “retirement.” Honestly, if I’m asked by someone now about my situation, and I don’t want to get involved in a whole conversation, I will simply say, “I retired.” It’s easier than having to go through a long explanation about “surrendering orders,” and all that.

Choosing to Quit

Yup! I quit! Call me a quitter if you want, but the reality is I didn’t quit ministry. I simply quit the United Methodist Church. (If we’re being honest, the UMC left me long before I left it.) I had no idea if it was the right decision then, but time has proven that it was a course-correction in my faith journey, and for that course-correction, I give thanks.

Had I chosen to “retire” in the UMC, I would now be limited by the same Annual Conference (that I loved so dearly) as to where I could preach the Gospel, or even attend as a worshipper. If a family member passed away, and that person’s funeral was in a congregation that disaffiliated from the UMC, I couldn’t (with integrity) participate in their funeral without fear of punishment (financially held hostage would be a better characterization). I’m not always sure what Jesus would do, but in that case, I’m pretty sure.

Yeah, I know…sour grapes and all that. I shouldn’t be chewing gum that I’ve chewed before, but the reflections of this weekend have been a reminder of the tensions in life. I’ve been both filled with sorrow and filled with joy…filled with grief and filled with anticipation…filled with heartache and filled with gratitude. In the midst of it all, there is grace–God’s grace. It is only by His grace that the tension is bearable.

So, I’m just going to hold on to Him. Won’t you join me?

Until next time, keep looking up…

Some Days Just be that Way…

/ pastorlynnmalone / Leave a comment

Did you ever have one of those days? You know? One of those days when you’re afraid to ask, “What can happen next?” Yeah! Friday was one of those days for me. I won’t bore you with all the details. Suffice it to say, I was glad when Friday was over. I swear, I thought it had to be Friday, the 13th!

Paul’s Bad Day

The Apostle Paul and his traveling companion, Silas, had one of those days, too. Actually, according to the Book of Acts and Paul’s own epistles, he had many of those days, but so do we. I’m thinking of one day in particular, though. It’s found in Acts 16.

Paul and Silas were minding their own business just preaching the Gospel headed to a prayer meeting in a town called Philippi when a demon-possessed slave girl begins following them shouting, “These men are servants of the Most High God, and they have come to tell you how to be saved” (Acts 16:17). I’d say that makes for a bad day.

Now, that wouldn’t generally be problematic except that the slave girl was persistent in her proclamation (day after day, the text says) until Paul finally tired of hearing her. He rebuked the evil spirit and commanded it to come out of the girl (Acts 16: 18).

Now, here’s the rub: the slave-girl was the property of a couple of guys who were making money off her ability to divine the future. Paul’s exorcism cost them money, so they went to the leaders of Philippi and brought charges against Paul and Silas. I’d say that makes for a bad day.

From Bad to Worse

It was a day that would get worse. The city officials ordered Paul and Silas stripped, beaten and thrown in prison. So, it goes from bad to worse–once in prison, they were ordered to be put in the inner dungeon and their feet be clamped in stocks (Acts 16: 22 – 24). Didn’t want these guys to escape.

But wait! The day gets even worse! Around midnight (v. 25), there was an earthquake (not unusual for the city of Philippi, but still–today? Really?). Don’t ask, “What else could go wrong?” You might just find out! The day, for Paul and Silas, was definitely “one of those days” you’d as soon forget.

Actually, though, it was an unforgettable day, but for reasons other than all that made it a bad day. It became a day of transformation, and perhaps the best day in the life of a family in Philippi–the jailer who was tasked with guarding Paul and Silas in prison.

A Transformative Day

What made it a transformative day in the jailer’s life? I think it started with Paul’s and Silas’s faith. Paul and Silas had a faithful attitude in their lives. On a day when adversity slapped them hard in the face, Paul and Silas chose to go to church. Well, they didn’t actually “go” to church. They chose to “have” church in prison. They chose to pray and sing hymns in the face of their adversity (Acts 16: 25).

Paul and Silas chose to live in the hope they had in Jesus Christ. I guess they lived what Zig Ziglar would subsequently teach–“Attitude determines altitude.” When faced with adversity, we can exhibit hope, or we can exhibit hopelessness. Paul and Silas chose hope.

Now, by adversity, I’m not talking about the kind of adversity football and baseball coaches talk about. When you’re down by a touchdown, or when you’re a couple of runs down in the bottom of the ninth inning, that’s not adversity. It’s a game. Yes, you can show spunk and exhibit grit and determination, but a win or a loss is not generally going to impact the course of history. Pulling out a win is not overcoming adversity, Coach.

Adversity is hearing the news, “You’ve got cancer.” Or worse, “Your child has cancer.” That’s adversity!

Adversity is hearing the news, “You’re position is being phased out. We won’t need you anymore.”

Adversity is hearing, “I want a divorce.”

Adversity is losing a child.

Adversity is losing a home.

Adversity is being wrongfully accused.

Adversity is…well, you get the idea.

Here’s the thing, though. Adversity is a fact of life. Though we seek to avoid it desperately, it always rears its ugly head, and usually at the least convenient times. That’s because life isn’t fair, nor is life certain. Unexpected circumstances can bring adversity into our lives, or our own bad choices can bring adversity into our lives. Even the actions of others can (intentionally or unintentionally) cause us to face adversity.

Certainly, Paul and Silas did nothing to warrant their place in prison. The actions of others placed them there. Yet, they chose the hope of their faith over the hopelessness and injustice of their circumstances.

My friends, I’ve said all that to say this–May our first reaction in the face of adversity be to sing the Doxology:

“Praise God from whom all blessings flow. Praise Him all creatures here below. Praise Him about ye heavenly hosts. Praise Father, Son and Holy Ghost.”

Praise is transformative. For us…and, for others.

Yup! Some days just be that way. Friday was one for me. You know what, though. It’s Sunday! I survived.

Whatever we’re going through, we will make it through. Paul and Silas did. So will we!

Until next time, keep looking up…

Random Randomness Randomly Recorded…

/ pastorlynnmalone / 3 Comments

First, Happy Father’s Day! I hope all the fathers who read my blog have the best day ever. As a father myself, I can honestly say we don’t need a gift from our children today. Please realize that YOU are the gift. Your presence, your hug. your love, your wellness are all that matters to your dad. Give him those gifts and you’ll make his day.

I hit upon an amazing idea this week: ban all drive-thru windows. As I was sitting in a drive-thru (for an insufferably long time), I thought about how much fuel is wasted every day by us waiting in drive-thru lines. Not only that, but actually having to get out and go in to an establishment would help all of us with our personal interaction skills. If we want to save the planet, let’s start here.

All the world’s problems cannot be summarized by a meme. Meme’s simply reflect the shallow thinking most of our leaders utilize to make decisions. Just as our problems can’t be summarized by memes, neither can they be solved by them.

Solving the world’s problems takes hard work. No one wants to work hard anymore. Heck! No one wants to work, period. Everyone wants success, but everyone wants success handed to them. 98% of success is just showing up everyday.

Speaking of hard work: Moving is hard work. I don’t care if you’re moving from one room to another, it’s still moving and I hate it. I’m grateful I have the opportunity to do it, but I still hate it. Talk about cognitive dissonance!

I think it’s perfectly okay to celebrate the 250th birthday of the U. S. Army, even if the planned celebration happens to fall on a certain terribly despised person’s birthday. I am grateful for the U. S. Army, and for the men and women who have sacrificed for our nation. Why not celebrate such a momentous occasion?

I’m also reminded that the terribly despised person mentioned above is only despised by less than half the country. That means that more than half the country doesn’t despise him. We can’t live our lives mad at half the nation.

My statement of the above probably just angered some of you who read this blog. It’s okay to be angry with me. What’s not okay is for you to vilify me or demonize me. That’s what is wrong with our culture today.

Democrats and Republicans appear to be living on two different planets. What’s worse is there is no communication capability between the two planets.

Social media is the anti-Christ!

Why don’t we turn off social media and sit down over a cup of coffee and talk to each other about our hopes and dreams, our families, our future, our faith? We might make a little progress toward a better future.

I was reminded by social media that it is Annual Conference season. I miss Annual Conference (oh! how I make myself laugh sometimes!)! What I miss is the relationships that Annual Conference fosters. I didn’t get to attend a “Journey” session (Annual Conference) for my own denomination this year. I need some good, old-fashioned collegiality right now.

I might have more collegiality if I were a bit more collegial myself.

I’ve determined that I need saving everyday. Preaching on Paul’s conversion this week reminds me that even good, righteous holy people need Jesus. I’m the chief among them. I’m also reminded that I can be so busy doing God’s work that I fail to realize that doing God’s work and doing God’s will are not always the same thing.

Folks, we need to pray for Israel and Iran. People dying is never a good thing.

I suppose that’s enough randomness for one day. Happy Father’s Day! Oh, wait! I said that already.

Until next time, keep looking up…

Mid-life Mayhem…

/ pastorlynnmalone / Leave a comment

No! Not me. King David…you know? King David of Israel. It had to be mid-life mayhem. Some call it a mid-life crisis. It’s the only thing that makes sense.

What am I talking about? I’m talking about David’s tryst with Bathsheba (2 Samuel 11 & 12), and his subsequent cover-up. Here’s how the encounter begins:

11 In the spring, at the time when kings go off to war, David sent Joab out with the king’s men and the whole Israelite army. They destroyed the Ammonites and besieged Rabbah. But David remained in Jerusalem.

2 One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace. From the roof he saw a woman bathing. The woman was very beautiful, 3 and David sent someone to find out about her. The man said, “She is Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam and the wife of Uriah the Hittite.” 4 Then David sent messengers to get her. She came to him, and he slept with her. (Now she was purifying herself from her monthly uncleanness.) Then she went back home. 5 The woman conceived and sent word to David, saying, “I am pregnant.”

According to the biblical chronology, David was somewhere between ages 49 – 56 when this event occurred (see here).

So, all week long I’ve been asking myself, “How could David do such an obviously wrong thing?” I mean, seriously, he is God’s anointed one, a “man after God’s own heart,” the poet of Israel, the one who was/is the foreshadow of Messiah. How does he fall, and so obviously and precipitously? It just doesn’t make sense. What could it be?

I thought, perhaps, it was boredom. Here’s David lounging around in the spring of the year, sleeping until afternoon, hanging around an empty palace (all his warriors are off at war). The proverb “idle minds are the devil’s playground” is true. Perhaps if David had been productively occupied, say out with his warriors, this might not have happened.

Maybe David had a sense of entitlement at work. You know? He was thinking, “I’m the King. No one says ‘No,’ to the King. I can do what I want.”

While it is true that Israel was governed by the Mosaic Law, and the Mosaic Law was very specific concerning the act of adultery, I wonder if David saw all the surrounding kings who WERE the law in their kingdoms, and thought, “I can make my own law,” or thought he wasn’t subject to the law. Yeah, it’s a stretch, but I’m trying to make sense of it all.

Some have suggested that it wasn’t a sin for David to be with Bathsheba. Under this line of reasoning, David instituted the practice of issuing a “conditional divorce” to soldiers going off to war in case they were lost in action so that their widows would be free to re-marry legally. Uriah was conditionally divorced from Bathsheba because he was at war. According to this reasoning, David’s sin wasn’t adultery, it was the murder of Uriah and its cover-up. I’m not sure I buy it, but it is an interesting perspective.

I’m not justifying David’s actions with these excuses. Just trying to understand his actions. Nothing justifies David’s actions. Nothing justifies our sin. Suffice it to say that this episode in the history of Israel and the life of David stands as a cautionary tale for all of us. May I share some of the cautions I’ve noticed as I’ve reflected on David’s actions?

Caution #1: Everyone is subject to the power of sin.

No one (not even David) is perfect. David had a human heart (even if it was one after God’s own) just like the rest of us. As the Apostle James reminds us:

14 but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. 15 Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death (James 1: 14 – 15 NIV).

Yes, David (up to this moment) has been the foreshadow of Jesus Christ, but this moment is the pivot of David’s life. Before this moment, the biblical writers portray only the triumphs of his life. He is anointed as king. He wins mighty victories over his enemies. The nation writes songs about him and celebrate his victories. He becomes king, and a good one, too. He shows mercy to his enemies. He reunited the Kingdom of Judah and the nation of Israel. He is riding high in Israel.

Events after this encounter are recorded as pure tragedy. He loses a child (the child born of this tryst), he has a son rape one of his daughters. Another son kills that son. Children revolt. David flees. He gets old and dies. Literally, the triumphs of David’s life turn to the tragedies of David’s life, and this is the pivot point.

Before this moment, David is (appropriately) compared to Jesus Christ. From this moment, David is contrasted to Jesus Christ, and we discover that even David needs Jesus, for even he is subject to the power of sin.

Even the chronicler of 1 & 2 Kings saw this as the pivotal event of David’s life:

5 For David had done what was right in the eyes of the Lord and had not failed to keep any of the Lord’s commands all the days of his life—except in the case of Uriah the Hittite (1 Kings 15: 5 NIV).

Caution #2: Sin destroys everything.

David’s family fell apart. Uriah lost his life. Bathsheba lost her family and a child. Sin, this sin, destroyed it all.

Yes, David repented of his sin (see 2 Samuel 12 and Psalm 51), but repentance doesn’t negate the consequences of our sin. We are left with pain and grief caused by the brokenness of sin.

Yes, salvation in Jesus Christ saves us from the penalty of sin (Romans 6: 23), and he (along with John Wesley) says we are saved from sin’s power (Romans 6: 14), but nowhere does the bible indicate that salvation in Jesus saves us from the consequences of sin.

Caution #3: Everything is not enough.

David had it all. He was famous. Fame didn’t satisfy him.

David had success. He had won great victories on the battlefield and reunified the nation. He had brought the Ark of the Covenant back to Jerusalem. Success didn’t satisfy him.

David had great wealth. Kings from surrounding kingdoms were paying him. tribute money and he was adding his wealth to the treasury to build the glory of Israel–the Temple. His great wealth didn’t satisfy him.

He had everything, yet he wanted more.

The blessings of the economic realities of the United States of America has created a very comfortable environment for all of us. Our success has left us wanting more, more, more. In all our pursuit of more, we are moving further and further away from the Lord. We’re busy chasing anything to fill the emptiness only God can fill.

Caution #4: Anything might be legal, but not everything is moral.

David may, in fact, have seen himself as the law of the land, and by a simple edict established anything as legal. But, just because something is legal doesn’t make it moral. When man’s law and God’s law come up against each other, God’s law will win every time. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow. But, ultimately, God’s law will prevail.

Perhaps David had already experienced this reality. We know that Genesis 2 is explicit in God’s plan for marriage–a man and woman become one flesh. Yet, David had 8 wives (at least 8!). Yes, it was legal, but legal doesn’t mean moral.

Yes, gay marriage may be legal. Legal doesn’t mean moral.

Yes, abortion may be legal. Legal doesn’t mean moral.

Yes, gambling may be legal. Legal doesn’t mean moral.

Yes, it may be legal for the United Methodist Church to seize all the property of the local congregation. Legal doesn’t mean moral (Yes! I went there!)

Finding Jesus.

As I always do, I need to find Jesus in these Old Testament accounts. Where can I see Jesus in this unfortunate episode in David’s and Bathsheba’s lives?

Well, Jesus is certainly present in their genealogy. Matthew’s Gospel mentions Bathsheba in Jesus’ family tree, so there’s the literal sense in which Jesus is present.

Beyond that, though, I see God’s sovereignty at work in all the brokenness of their lives. God’s will is accomplished (salvation comes through Jesus) even though David is disobedient and sinful. There is hope for me yet. All my broken, sinful attitudes and actions will not thwart God’s plan. For that I am grateful.

What a testament to God’s grace! It’s all grace, and Jesus came so that we might know the grace of God up close and personal. Repentance is grace. Forgiveness is grace.

What a great lesson to learn in mid-life (or at any other point in life). It’s a lesson I’m learning a little past mid-life, but I pray that I AM learning it.

Coming to understand the depths of God’s grace opens us to a new (or renewed) gratitude for Him. No, it won’t necessarily change my circumstances, but it will change my perspective and attitude. It can, literally, give me new life–God’s life in Jesus Christ.

Oh, that I should be so blessed.

Until next time, keep looking up…

A Man After God’s Heart…

/ pastorlynnmalone / Leave a comment

Israel’s King David is (perhaps) the most well-known religious figure in the world besides Jesus Christ. He certainly is to the Jewish people and to most Christians. Honestly, to most Christians (and not a few Jews) he’s almost superhuman.

I bring David up because I’ve been meditating on his life, and particularly his calling (anointing as king) all week long. I’ve preached the passage before, and I’m preaching it again this week, but as I’ve studied and meditated this week, I just can’t seem to get to the “heart” of one particular passage of Scripture:

7 But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16: 7 NIV)

I have been stuck on the phrase, “the Lord looks at the heart” all week. I’ve asked myself three questions all week long:

  1. What does the Lord see when He looks at the human heart?
  2. What did the Lord see when He looked at David’s heart?
  3. What does the Lord see when He looks at my heart?

The Context

I suppose I should set the context for the passage. It was the period of the Judges in Israel’s history when the people began clamoring for a King (1 Samuel 8). Samuel’s time as prophet/judge was drawing to a close and the people rejected his sons, who had been tapped to take his place. Samuel’s sons were corrupt and the people knew it. They wanted different leadership.

The lesson in that is be careful what you ask for. You might just get it. What the people got was their first king named Saul. Saul, who was “the most handsome man in all Israel–head and shoulders above everyone else in the land” (1 Samuel 9:2). Unfortunately this tall handsome guy turned out to be half-crazy and disobedient, and was ultimately rejected by God as King of Israel (1 Samuel 15).

Enter God’s call to Samuel to anoint another King in Saul’s place, and this takes us to the sleepy little town outside Jerusalem called Bethlehem where Jesse and his family keep flocks for a living. Jesse is the grandson of Ruth and Boaz (find their story here), and the Lord tells Samuel to go and anoint one of Jesse’s sons as the new King He has chosen for His people Israel.

Samuel is hesitant to do so (What if Saul finds out?), so the Lord tells Samuel to go to Bethlehem to offer a sacrifice and invite Jesse’s family to the sacrifice, and while you’re at it, take the horn of oil–kinda’ keep it out of sight until the time is right–and when I tell you, anoint a new King.

I could chase a rabbit here and explore the idea that God uses deception to accomplish His will, but that’s for another day. I’m just going to leave that thought right there because I really want to understand what God sees when He looks at David’s (and my) heart.

Samuel makes the trek to Bethlehem, invites Jesse’s family and begins to parade Jesse’s sons before the gathered body. Eliab, the oldest, is brought forward first. “Surely,” Samuel thinks, “this is the one.” He’s the oldest, so it’s got to be him, right? Wrong!

It’s then that the Lord announces to Samuel verse 7. See, Samuel just can’t get past appearances. Eliab is the oldest, perhaps the tallest, too. Samuel uses the same standard for David that was used for the previous King, Saul. Even the prophet/judge Samuel misses the mark. He does what we all are prone to doing–we like judging a book by its cover. The Lord says, “Not so fast!”

In order from oldest to youngest, seven of Jesse’s sons are brought to Samuel. All seven are rejected. Finally, Samuel asks Jesse if there are any more sons. “Yes,” he replies, “but he’s the youngest and he’s busy tending the flocks since you’ve got the rest of us here.”

“Send for him,” Saul says. “We’re not having supper until he gets here.”

David arrives. He is the chosen one. Saul anoints him as Israel’s next King. The Lord looked past his appearance and saw his heart.

This is where it gets really sticky for me. I (along with countless pastors in the past) have preached that there was something special about David’s heart. If we could just figure out what that was, we could learn how to be “people after God’s own heart” (1 Samuel 13:14 and Acts 13:22).

Godly Character

Yeah, I came up with lots of good sermon material. I can easily come up with 10 characteristics that reflect David’s heart. All one has to do is read the Psalms:

Humility – Lowborn men are but a breath, the highborn are but a lie; if weighed on a balance, they are nothing; together they are only a breath. Psalm 62:9

Reverence – I call to the Lord, who is worthy of praise, and I am saved from my enemies. Psalm 18:3

Respectfulness – Be merciful to me, O Lord, for I am in distress; my eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief. Psalm 31:9

Trust – The LORD is my light and my salvation—whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life—of whom shall I be afraid? Psalm 27:1

Loving – I love you, O Lord, my strength. Psalm 18:1

Devotion – You have filled my heart with greater joy than when their grain and new wine abound. Psalm 4:7

Recognition – I will praise you, O Lord, with all my heart; I will tell of all your wonders. Psalm 9:1

Faithfulness – Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever. Psalm 23:6

Obedience – Give me understanding, and I will keep your law and obey it with all my heart. Psalm 119:34

Repentance – For the sake of your name, O Lord, forgive my iniquity, though it is great. Psalm 25:11

Yeah, that would make a great (and long) sermon. Hey, if I could just exhibit those characteristics, I’d be a great Christian. The Lord would see my heart and He’d just smile.

A Dose of Reality

But, there are two passages of Scripture that have given me “heart-burn” as I’ve prayed over this passage. The first is found in Jeremiah 17: 9-10:

The heart is deceitful above all things
    and beyond cure.
    Who can understand it?

10 “I the Lord search the heart
    and examine the mind,
to reward each person according to their conduct,
    according to what their deeds deserve.”

The second is in Romans:

There is no difference between Jew and Gentile, 23 for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, 24 and all are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus. (Romans 3: 22b-24 NIV)

In light of Jeremiah 17 and Romans 3, I’m not so sure David had a great heart. I’m not so sure I do, either!

Yes, David could be all the things we talked about. He could have great faith and be wonderfully obedient. He could show proper reverence, respect and humility. He could be a great leader of people. He could be all those things, but he could also be an adulterer and murderer (2 Samuel 11). Let’s not forget that he was a less than stellar parent, too (2 Samuel 13-14).

I, too, want to say I have a heart after God’s heart, but then I look at my own heart and think, “Do I really?” No! I’m much like Rev. Alexander Whyte, who upon receiving great praise from one of his happy congregants, replied, “Madam, if you could see my heart, you’d spit in my face.”

Yes, being able to develop godly characteristics will always make me a better person, but being a better person will not save me. Only Jesus Christ can save me! How do I get from my sad, sinful heart to God’s heart? Only through Jesus Christ. He is the key. That must be what God sees when He looks at David’s heart. I pray it is what He sees when He looks at mine.

How so?

I take my clue from John Woodhouse, who translates the passage thusly: “For the Lord sees not as man sees, for man sees according to the eyes, but the Lord sees according to the heart.” It is a subtle, but major difference in this and the translation of most interpreters. In this rendering, it is God’s heart that He sees…meaning that David was chosen according to God’s purpose, just as Israel was “chosen” by God.

God views everything according to His own intentions and purposes. what I mean is that God’s choice is not on account of any peculiar fondness that he has for David—not because he has a particular liking to David, a liking that he doesn’t share for the other brothers, or that David has a peculiar and special quality which makes him attractive to God.

What it means is the fact that God, because he is God and because he is sovereign, is able to divinely select the one who is to be the king. And what it has to deal with is the fact of God’s electing (we Wesleyans hate that word) love rather than some notion of the suitability of a particular person.

Our Only Hope

It’s not that David’s heart was full of God, but rather that God’s heart was full of David. It was God looking through David’s heart to see Jesus Christ. It’s all about the place the man has in God’s heart rather than the place God has in the man’s heart.

I can only trust that when God looks at my heart, he sees Jesus Christ. If He doesn’t, I am lost, indeed, for only in Jesus Christ can I find redemption, reconciliation and salvation. He alone is my source of hope. I will put my trust in Him alone.

I’ve probably muddied the waters for everyone except myself, but I have, at least for myself, gotten to the “heart” of the matter. After all, every event in the Old Testament is leading us to Jesus. My own righteousness is as filthy rags (Isaiah 64:6). I can’t depend on my own heart. I can only depend on the loving heart of God.

I want to be a man who has a place in God’s heart.

Until next time, keep looking up…

Empty!

/ pastorlynnmalone / Leave a comment

This blog, like Easter itself, if full of empty. Unlike this blog, though, Easter empty is full of God’s promises. The empty cross is full of God’s promise of forgiveness. The empty tomb is full of God’s promise of eternal life. The empty grave clothes are full of God’s promise of a personal relationship with His Son, Jesus Christ.

Even though you clicked on the link to read what you thought was a blog filled with profound insights into the mystery of Easter only to be disappointed by its emptiness, you will not be disappointed by the empty things you find on Easter morning.

My prayer for all of us this morning is that we will live into the fullness of God’s promises in the empty cross, the empty tomb and the empty grave clothes.

Now, get up and go to church!

Until next time, keep looking up…

I Still Don’t Understand…

/ pastorlynnmalone / Leave a comment

I’ve been contemplating Jesus’ parable of the Prodigal Son all week in preparation for Sunday. I’ve preached the parable many times before (find one example here), so one of things that makes it so difficult to preach again is finding something fresh and new to say.

You remember the parable, right? A man had two sons. The younger son tells the father that he wants his share of his father’s estate now. The father divides his estate between his two sons and the younger son travels to a distant land where he wastes his money in “prodigal” living.

When the younger son “comes to himself,” he devises a scheme to return home to the father. Surprisingly, the father receives him back and throws the grandest of parties for his lost son who is now found.

Meanwhile, the older son returns home after working in the father’s fields. He discovers the party being thrown for the younger son and becomes angry. He refuses to go in and participate, so the father comes out to him. “‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found‘” (Luke 15:32).

A Story Once Told

I’ve shared the story of the first time my grandfather let me drive solo (find it here), so I’ll not share it here again, but I said that I didn’t understand it then that my grandfather was painting me a picture of God’s grace. As a matter of full confession, now that I’m so much older (that was almost 50 years ago!), I’m not so sure I understand it any better. Oh, I understand what my grandfather was doing, but I don’t really understand grace any better.

Okay, okay, okay! Yes, I do understand grace better…and, that’s the problem. I understand it. I just don’t want to live it. In my old age…the age when I should be living more as the Father than either of the sons…I find myself in the older son.

Jesus told the story to the scribes and Pharisees who were complaining about Jesus eating with sinners. In response to their complaint, he tells three stories: the lost sheep, the lost coin and the lost son. Each one builds upon the other with the climax being the return of the lost son to the family. It is no wonder, that in response to the Pharisee and scribes, the story ends with the father’s interaction with the older son. The implication is clear: the older son was representative of the scribes and Pharisees.

Good Guys or Bad Guys

This is where it gets sticky for me. The scribes and the Pharisees in the New Testament are the bad guys, right? But, I consider the older son for a moment and I think, “Wait! He’s really not that bad.”

Here’s what we know about the older son. First, he was industrious. He was working the fields. He was doing his duty. Aren’t those laudable characteristics?

He was also very prudent. He said to his father, “…this son of yours has squandered your property…”

The older son exhibited loyalty to the father. He was where he was supposed to be doing what he was supposed to be doing. As a matter of fact, it was his loyalty, industriousness and prudence that kept the family farm together. It was because of him that the younger son even had a place to return to at all. He was the good son.

I want to be the good son. I like hard work. I like industriousness. I like prudence. I like loyalty. What is the danger in any of those qualities? Well, I can only tell you what I see in me…

The Pharisee in Me

First, sometimes I think I care more about tradition than I do people. I get too busy working that I don’t see the need of people around me…or I just don’t care. Apparently, the older brother knew what the younger son was up to: “squandered your property on prostitutes” (vs. 30). He knew but he didn’t do anything about it. Was it because he didn’t care?

Have I become hardened to the brokenness of others? Am I indifferent to the suffering around me? I’m reminded of what Clovis Chappell said, “There is no more dangerous or cruel sin than that of indifference–the ability to look upon the wounds and woes of others and be unmoved.”

God help me, but sometimes I really feel like I don’t care! I feel like a man standing on a pier watching someone drown and rather than throwing them a rope I simply say, “Shoulda’ learned to swim like I did.”

The world is going to hell. The world needs grace and I need to show it, but it’s just so hard! It’s hard because of the second thing I see in me, and that is that my sense of duty and justice have taken the place of joy in my life. My sense of justice can cause me to get angry. I didn’t say righteously indignant. There’s a difference.

Righteous indignation is born of love. Anger is born of envy. Jesus demonstrated righteous indignation when he drove the money changers out to the Temple (Matthew 21: 12-17). It was his love and concern for the people that motivated him. On the other hand, it was the envy of the Pharisees that motivated them to pursue Jesus, even to his death. What motivates me? I wonder?

Become the Father

This older son was farther away from the father than the younger son ever was. He may have been close in proximity, but he was further in experience. I think it is because the older son just didn’t understand the father. The father tells him, “Everything I have is yours…(vs. 31).” The father had already given it to him: “So he divided his property between them (v. 12).” The older son spent a lifetime trying to earn what he had already been given.

The implication of the entire story is for all of us–both older sons and younger–sons to become like the father. But, I’m just going to leave it right here–grace is easier to receive than it is to give. Honestly, the Father has got a whole lot more work to do in me.

So, I guess that’s why I still don’t understand. Maybe one day I will.

Until next time, keep looking up…

A Good, Short Sermon (?)…

/ pastorlynnmalone / Leave a comment

The adage is “There is no such thing as a bad, short sermon.” I choose to disagree. As a one-time District Superintendent, I will say that I’ve actually heard some bad short sermons. Actually, I’ve heard some bad sermons, and I found myself giving thanks to the good Lord that they were short. If one has to endure bad sermons, it is good when they’re short!

Why am I talking about short sermons? Well, as one who has been known to preach long sermons, I’m trying my hand at a short sermon this morning. Why a short sermon? Numerous reasons, but primarily because we’re having a potluck after worship this morning, and we have to flip our worship space into fellowship space. That, and the food will get cold. Oh, and I have to be in Dallas before 5:00 p.m., and I need to hit the road.

Yes, I know. Selfish reasons for preaching a short sermon, but it is what it is. The problem lies in the fact that my chosen passage (Luke 8: 26 – 39) is a long and difficult passage. How does one distill demon-possession, cemeteries and suicidal pigs into a 1,000 word manuscript? I’ll give it a try. My fear is the congregation will like it and they’re response will be, “Why can’t all your sermons be that short?”

So, here goes…

A Brief Introduction

I really should have entitled the sermon “Comfortable with Our Crazy,” because that’s what we find in the unfolding events of Luke 8: 26 – 39. I went, instead, with “A Disturbing Presence,” because as we read the passage, we are a bit disturbed by the entire scene.

I mean, really, demon possessed people, graveyards and suicidal pigs is enough to disturb anyone. Yet, as disturbing as those images tend to be, the most disturbing presence is Jesus, Himself. When Jesus comes to town, He tends to disturb everything.

Our natural tendency is to focus on the demon possessed man whom the community has sent to the cemetery. You know? That’s what we do with broken people. We send them to the margins. “That man is crazy! Let’s push him away. We can’t deal with his kind of crazy.”

If we were doing an in-depth bible study, we’d take time to look at this whole idea of demon possession because we are a bit disturbed by the whole idea. This is, however, a Sunday morning sermon and we’ve got food getting cold, so we’re not going to dive into that subject.

The Power of Jesus

This is, ultimately, not a story about demon possessed people. It’s a story about the power of Jesus to transform a broken life. It’s a story about the authority of Jesus, even over the darkest of powers. It’s a story about Jesus’ call to tell others about the goodness of God, so, let’s focus on Jesus this morning.

Let’s focus on the disturbance Jesus brings to the demons. This man lived among the tombs, isolated from society, stripped of dignity, and enslaved by spiritual oppression. Yet, Jesus does not avoid him; instead, He steps into his brokenness with authority and compassion.

This reminds us that Jesus is not intimidated by the darkness in our lives. He has the power to confront and overcome anything that binds us, whether it be sin, addiction, or fear (Luke 8:29-33). His authority over the supernatural demonstrates that He is Lord over all creation.

I am reminded of what the Apostle Paul told the Church at Philippi: “that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father” (Philippians 2: 10 –  11 NKJV).

The Inclusivity of the Gospel

Jesus not only disturbed the demons, but He also disturbed the pig-herders. I mean, seriously, he destroyed their livelihood. If we were doing that Bible study on this passage, we’d look at the significance of the pigs in the encounter, but since it’s a Sunday morning sermon and it is supposed to be short, we’re only going to mention that the fact there were pigs nearby indicates Jesus was in Gentile territory. 

So, what do we learn about Jesus? The Gospel is for everyone! Jesus intentionally went to Gentile territory to spread the Good News. The Gospel is the most inclusive message in the world, but the very nature of the Gospel is it’s power to transform people. Jesus doesn’t intend to leave us the way he found us, either individually or corporately. His Gospel transforms people and entire communities.

The Real Disturbance

When we talk about communities, we can’t overlook how disturbing Jesus was to the townspeople. They had become comfortable with crazy, and when Jesus showed up to deal with the crazy, they preferred crazy to Christ. 

What was their response when they saw the crazy, naked, homeless man clothed and sitting in his right mind? It wasn’t “Oh, how wonderful. Now we can invite him back into the community and to his family.” No. It was, “Hey, Jesus? Could you just leave and leave us alone?” 

Jesus’ presence there on the seashore became a threat to the townsfolk’ own complacency. He upset their apple cart. And worse still, he cost them money. After all, 2,000 pigs cost a lot of money in the first century. Jesus took their known, comfortable circumstances (they had gotten used to the crazy man in the cemetery and knew how to handle that situation), and forced them to confront the unknown. They could cope with the known, even if the known was bad, but they were afraid of the unknown.

The most disturbing thing of all is the fact that the power of God was at work among the people and they failed to see it. Jesus’ presence forced the people to confront the evil that was around them, and that was a very uncomfortable position. We’d rather turn a blind eye to evil around us. Doing so allows us to turn a blind eye to the evil within us.

That is what is most disturbing. If Jesus can drive out someone else’s demons, He might be able to drive out mine. I’m rather comfortable with my own sins. “No, Jesus, could you just leave me alone? I don’t want to be disturbed?”

A Brief Conclusion

Jesus comes in power to transform us and our communities. As the old hymn says,

He breaks the power of cancelled sin,
he sets the prisoner free;
his blood can make the foulest clean;
his blood availed for me.

There are only two responses to the power of Jesus among us. One, is to follow Jesus’ command to the healed man—“Go tell others about the goodness of God,” or two, ask Jesus to leave us alone.

My friends, we are called to tell others about the goodness of God! That is the mission of the Church. Unfortunately, too many of us in the Church would rather be left alone. Which will you choose today?

So, you tell me–a good, short sermon? Eh! Maybe I should stick to longer ones.

Until next time, keep looking up…

Gone Fishing…

/ pastorlynnmalone / 1 Comment

If I were to stand in front of almost any congregation and ask the question, “Are you a disciple of Jesus Christ?,” depending upon the congregation, it is likely almost 100% of the hands would go up.

Unfortunately, I do not think we Christians really understand what it means to be a disciple of Jesus Christ. Now, I’m not saying this as a result of my observations of the people in the pews. I’m saying it because I’ve had an opportunity over the past week to reflect on my own discipleship, and I haven’t necessarily liked what I’ve seen.

I’ve been reflecting on my own discipleship as a result of reading again Jesus’ call of Peter, James and John from Luke’s gospel (5: 1 – 11). As Jesus prepares to call these guys to a life of discipleship, He gives them a demonstration of what discipleship looks like. It is in His demonstration to these first disciples that I learn what discipleship must look like in my own life.

Lesson #1: Discipleship is more than listening to the Word.

Jesus’ teaching begins with a session along the shoreline of the lake called Gennesaret. It was also called the Sea of Tiberias and the Sea of Galilee, and is situated 680 feet below sea level. It is called Lake Kinneret in Israel today.

Along the shore of the Lake is where the fishermen would be washing out and repairing their nets after an excursion on the lake. So here was Simon, after a tough night of fishing cleaning up his boat, setting up the nets to dry in the sun, and along comes Jesus who chooses his boat and asks for it to be pushed just off shore to serve as a floating platform. This would have been an ideal way for Jesus’ voice to carry across the water to the maximum amount of the people – and the water would keep the crowds back so that more could hear, because Jesus always drew a crowd.

I wonder if Peter thought it an imposition for Jesus to ask to use his boat as a platform from which to teach the crowds? It may have been a little inconvenient, but Peter was apparently willing to be inconvenienced a little for this itinerant preacher who was all the rage around the lake. Simon was like, “Let’s see what’s got everyone so interested in this guy.”

So, Jesus sits down and teaches. Apparently, it’s a compelling message because when it’s over, Jesus turns to Peter and says, “Let’s go fishing.” Surprisingly, Peter says, “Okay.” Well, he argues a little, but he ultimately defers to Jesus.

I say surprisingly because, well what can a carpenter teach a fisherman about fishing? Peter’s hesitation comes from the fact that one, he’s tired, two, he’s discouraged, and three, he fishes for a living–he knows where the fish are…and where they’re not. Nevertheless…

There must have been something incredibly compelling in what Jesus spoke from that boat that day. Whatever it was, it prompted Peter to act on Jesus’ command. Discipleship is never simply hearing the Word of God, though some of us seem to think that’s enough because that’s all we seem to do.

What do I mean? Too many of us who claim to be disciples of Jesus are content to sit and soak up as much information about Jesus as we can. We join another Bible study. We begin a small group ministry. Join a new Sunday school class. Go to another conference. Listen to all the good podcasts. We try to gain as much information as we can gain, thinking that somehow information equals transformation. Information does not equal transformation. Yet, that’s the discipleship model I see in too many churches (even some of the ones I’ve pastored).

Our fishing has become like Mark Twain’s. Mark Twain liked to go fishing, but he didn’t want to be bothered by either fish or people. When he wanted to relax by doing nothing, people thought he was lazy, but if he went fishing he could relax all he wanted. People would see him sitting by the river bank and they would say, “Look, he’s fishing, don’t bother him.”

So Mr. Twain had the perfect solution: he would take a fishing pole, line, and a bobber, but he wouldn’t put a hook on the end. He would cast the bobber in the water and lay back on the bank. That way he could relax all he wanted and he would be bothered neither by man nor fish.

Discipleship isn’t discipleship until the teaching of Jesus has moved us to action. I am reminded of the words of James: “But don’t just listen to God’s word. You must do what it says. Otherwise, you are only fooling yourselves” (James 1:22 NLT).

If we believe that going to church to hear another sermon, or another bible study, or going to another conference, or listening to podcasts is what it takes to be a disciple, then we have missed the boat (pun intended)! Discipleship is both a noun and a verb. Discipleship is as much action as it is information.

Why are we so content with gaining information? One reason I can think of is that fish are smelly and messy. Discipleship is about inviting others into a relationship with Jesus and that can be messy indeed. Unfortunately, too many of us don’t want to get our hands dirty.

You’d think as much as I like to eat fish that I would enjoy time catching fish. Not so! I’d much rather spend my time doing other things. I want to walk into a restaurant and sit down, let someone else do the messy work of cleaning and cooking the fish. Simply bring my fish to the table, let me enjoy them, then walk out for someone else to clean up the mess. Sure, I’ll pay for the meal and if the service has been good, I’ll even give a tip. I’ll leave full and the only transformation that took place was the transformation around my waistline.

The call to discipleship is a call to action, and it is here I learn a second lesson:

Lesson #2: Discipleship demands radical obedience.

Jesus will ask us to do crazy things…things that defy logic. Peter knew that what Jesus was asking was completely illogical. He knew fishing deep waters in the heat of the day made no sense. It was bad enough that he had fished all night and came up empty, now Jesus was asking him to go out into the deep waters and try again.

Give Simon credit, he said something more than this first reaction to Jesus request. Simon also said, “But if you say so, we’ll try again.” Peter exercised the very essence of submission and obedience—I don’t understand, I am exhausted, I’ve already tried this and it didn’t work. But if you say so,…”

Jesus asked for Simon to submit to his word – and he did – not knowing what would happen. Suspecting it was useless, expecting nothing more than wearier muscles and sunburn. Submission that costs nothing is without value and means little. Jesus asked Simon to go out into the deep water where his own strength failed him and to let down the nets one more time. 

How often do we face similar situations? God calls us to step out in faith, to do something that seems illogical or impossible from our human perspective. Maybe it’s forgiving someone who’s hurt us deeply, or taking a stand for our faith in a hostile environment, or giving generously when our own resources seem limited.

In these moments, will we respond like Peter? “Because you say so, Lord, I will.” This is the essence of discipleship – trusting God’s word over our own understanding.

Ultimately, it is obedience to the Word we’ve received that leads to our transformation. The miracle in this encounter is not the catch of fish, it is the transformation of Peter. Peter exclaimed, “I’m a sinful man!” All this time, Peter thought he was doing Jesus a solid, when the whole time it was Jesus who was transforming Peter.

Discipleship is not about what we can do for Jesus, it is about what Jesus really does for us. Obedience is grace that transforms us into the likeness of Jesus Christ.

Finally, it is through obedience that I learn…

Lesson #3: Discipleship is an all-or-nothing proposition.

Peter got back to the dock, and Luke tells us he left everything. Yeah, that miraculous catch of fish? He left it. Those boats? Left ’em! Those things that Peter believed brought him security, after all, he had mouths to feed and mortgages to pay, were really no security at all. He found his security in following Jesus.

This is the costly nature of discipleship. Following Jesus isn’t just about adding Him to our existing life; it’s about reorienting our entire life around Him. It might mean leaving behind old habits, changing career paths, or adjusting our priorities. For some, it might even mean leaving home or family to serve God.

You and I might not have to walk away from a boat, but there is plenty that we do need to walk away from. Jesus is calling us to walk away from our old life, our old ideas and our treasured possessions in exchange for a new and exciting life of following Him. 

Conclusion

So here are the questions I’ve been grappling with over the past week:

  1. Where is God calling me to obey, even if it defies logic?
  2. In what area of my life do I need to trust God for a miracle?
  3. What might I need to leave behind to fully follow Jesus?

May I invite you to join me in reflecting on those questions? I’d love to know your answers. You can leave them in the comments.

Until next time, keep looking up…

Getting Old Ain’t for Sissies…(Lessons I’ve Learned by Getting Old)

/ pastorlynnmalone / Leave a comment

It must be because I’ve been spending too much time in doctor’s offices, but I’m starting to feel old. I’m looking old, that’s for sure. All I have to do is walk by a mirror. The hair is getting grayer, the face a little more wrinkled. That much I can tell. Now, though, the looking and the feeling are catching up with each other.

Getting older has some advantages (though only a few). One advantage is grandchildren. Grandchildren are the cat’s meow, as they say. I’ve said before that if I had known grandchildren were this much fun, I would have skipped the children and gone straight for the grandchildren.

Another advantage is wisdom. Perhaps Job summed it up best when he said, “wisdom belongs to the aged, and understanding to the old” (Job 12:12 NLT), so there’s that! Solomon (the wisest man who ever lived) is credited with saying, “A gray head is a crown of glory; it is found in the way of righteousness” (Proverbs 16:31 NIV).

I’m willing to take Job and Solomon at their word. Sitting in doctor’s offices gives one lots of time to think. As I sat there awaiting my turn, I began to make a few mental notes of what I’ve learned as I’ve gotten older. I began to jot out a few of those lessons and I thought I’d might share those with you.

Lesson #1: I’m not Superman!

Did you ever believe that you needed to know everything? I used to believe that, and if I didn’t know something, I’d make something up just so I could provide an answer. I may not have always been right, but I was never in doubt!

I also believed I had to be in total control of my emotions, that I needed to make a ton of money, that I had to be naturally athletic, never get lost, never feel physical pain and that I had to know everything about cars and machinery. I don’t believe those things anymore.

I’m really not Superman, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound. Not only am I not able to, I no longer want to. I’m absolutely comfortable in my skin knowing what I know AND knowing what I don’t know. Actually, the older I’ve gotten, the more I know I don’t know, and the more I can admit I don’t know.

Lesson # 2: I’m not entitled to anything.

I really can’t say much about everyone else’s sense of entitlement, especially since it took me getting older to figure out I’m not entitled to anything.

I tried to figure out where this sense of entitlement comes from. It would be real easy to blame it on being an American citizen where our government (and by our government, I mean us) has developed numerous “entitlement” programs to keep us happy, but it could as easily come from being a consumer. More likely, though, it comes from simply being a man (a human) who is, in his unregenerate nature, selfish.

The older I’ve gotten, though, I’ve discovered that life…all of life…is sheer grace! Life is a gift and it is to be enjoyed as the gift that it is.

Our recent little house fire is an example. Oh, we are blessed, indeed! The fire could have been so much worse. We don’t know why it burned itself out, but it is grace that it did. Yes, there’s been consternation with clean-up companies and contractors, but even that is grace. Maybe the Lord is trying to teach me patience, and that is grace, too.

I’m not entitled to anything, and until I crucify that sense, it will be one of the greatest roadblocks to faithfulness to Jesus.

Lesson #3: Emotions are good things.

I grew up believing that it was okay to ask a man what he thinks, but never, ever ask a man what he feels. I don’t know that anyone specifically taught me that. I think it was just understood. Emotions were the domain of the fairer sex. Maybe it’s just the generation I am from.

The older I’ve gotten, the more I’ve come to understand and accept that the Lord gives us two ways to know him–our thoughts AND our emotions. We are emotional creatures. He made us that way. After all, we are created in His image, right?

Jesus was filled with emotion. He wept (John 11:35). He was angry (Matthew 21: 12 – 17). He was sorrowful (Matthew 26:38). He was compassionate (Mark 6:38). I could go on, but you get the picture.

I could make a similar list for God, the Father. He demonstrates grief (Genesis 6:6). He expressed anger (Deut. 9:22). He is compassionate (Judges 2:18). Again, you get the picture.

Admittedly, our emotions are subject to the sin within us, so we can’t depend upon them as an arbiter of salvation, but it is healthy to express our emotions rather than keeping them buttoned down. We men don’t have to be James Bond–always in control…of our emotions and everything else.

Lesson #4: I can’t do life alone.

Remember what God said in Genesis 2:18? Sure, you do–“The Lord God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him’.” We are created for community. We are, by nature, social animals. We need each other.

I’ll confess that I need Vanessa. I can’t imagine doing life without her. Heck, we practically raised one another (well, she raised me more than I raised her, but that’s another story). We married at age 18, and this October, we will celebrate 44 years together. We need each other!

As a man, though, I also need men in my life. God created men and women differently (Praise God!), and there are issues that men grapple with that women simply don’t understand, and there are issues women grapple with that men will never get. Yes, Vanessa is my best friend, but I need other (male) friends to share this journey of life with.

As a good Wesleyan, we need to practice accountability, and having male (or female) friends gives us an opportunity to do just that. Yes, we also need our time away from the crowds, but even when Jesus went away, he often took Peter, James and John with him.

I can’t do life alone!

Lesson #5: Power can be a positive thing.

This one might be a little touchy given the current climate toward masculinity, but sometimes I just need to “man-up.” Sometimes, my wife and my children (and grandchildren) need me to be a “knight in shining armor.” There is a reason we liked to play cops and robbers when we were kids. It was a natural reflection of and development for our masculinity. Masculinity is also the reason most little boys want to grow up to be firemen and astronauts. Yes, women can be those things, too, but I don’t know very many little girls who dream of being cops or firemen. That only comes as they get closer to adulthood.

Power used appropriately can be a very positive thing. I’m thinking of Ronald Reagan and his famous speech at the Berlin Wall: “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!” It was an exercise of power designed to make the world a better place. That is an appropriate use of authority/power.

Anytime I can use my power/authority to make life better for my family, my community, my church or others, then it is very positive, indeed. I shouldn’t be afraid of my masculinity in the service of others. It was Jesus who said, “All authority on heaven and earth has been given to me. Go therefore, and make disciples of all nations” (Matthew 28:18). It was authority used appropriately. I need to be like Jesus.

Lesson #6: “No” is a complete sentence.

I heard someone say once that “No” is a complete sentence. It took me getting older to understand how correct they were. I spent so much of my ministry years trying to be everything to everybody that I ended up making commitments that I neither could or wanted to keep. I made myself miserable by never turning anyone down.

Honestly, it was utter irresponsibility on my part. It wasn’t fair to those to whom I made commitments. It certainly wasn’t fair to my family, and it was killing me. I know it was the people-pleaser in me at work, and the devil would use it as a way to distract me from the more important elements of spiritual discipline.

In more recent years, I’ve said, “No,” to a lot of good things, but we have to say no to the good things so that we can say yes to the best things…or the more important things…or the more meaningful things.

And besides, as someone else said, “No for now is not no forever.” There may be a time when you can willingly fulfill a commitment that you can’t abide right now. You never know what door the Lord will open later on.

Lesson #7: I’m a lot braver than I give myself credit for.

Men are supposed to be courageous. Though I wanted to be Batman or Superman, I think I spent more of my life as Barney Fife.

May I say, though, that just the fact that I’m older is a testament to the fact that I’m braver than I ever gave myself credit for? Seriously, life is hard and to have made it this far proves that just living takes courage. I survived a car accident that, by mere inches, could have ended my life.

Hey, I survived raising children! That’s not for sissies either. They’re all productive, contributing members of society. I haven’t always been able to say that. Now I can say that, and I say it with humility and gratitude. Nope, I didn’t do it alone, and that’s another indication of courage. Vanessa and I have survived over 43 years of marriage.

Surviving life takes courage. That’s a reality. Just knowing that I can write this and you can read it is a testimony to the fact that we’re brave enough to get up every day and do life. The bravest thing a person can do is admit his limitations (mine are abundant). That’s why I’ve learned to trust Jesus for my salvation. He is the greatest source of our strength.

Conclusion

No, growing old isn’t for sissies. I have learned in all this that getting older isn’t about growing weaker, or more confused, or more limited. Growing older is about growing up and learning to understand what it means to be made in the image of God. That’s a lesson I’m still learning.

What about you? What lessons are you learning? Share them in the comments. I’d love to hear from you.

Until next time, keep looking up…